Asking for a friend or relative

There may be a delay in a response or they may be evasive, avoiding the conversation altogether, if this happens DO NOT force her to discuss the relationship, let her know you are there to listen if she wants to talk.

If she wants to talk, make sure she can speak openly in a place where she feels safe, listen carefully and patiently, and be empathetic to her situation, allow her to speak, don't advise or force her to do anything, this is a very difficult time for women, and leaving a relationship takes extreme courage and strength, also to stay in a relationship is equally hard, being judgemental and looking at the situation through your own eyes is very much different as a victim.

Acknowledge that no one has the right to hurt, abuse or frighten, she may even minimise the abuse, blaming the situation on the current environment, work stress, grieving, mental health or substance misuse, although all these things can exacerbate a situation, domestic abuse is a 'CHOICE' and the way she is being treated is wrong.

Help her to keep herself safe while in the property, this may be to have a grab bag ready with clothes/documents/medication/money/cards and store in a safe place, make a list of trusted people she can have on her phone, encourage her to keep notes on a App called Kulpa which enables victims to store evidence safely until they feel ready to report to the police. Help her contact FREEDA so trained staff can help her with finding a safe place.